Post by Admin on Sept 6, 2016 22:35:41 GMT
Not sure what I can use this for. I'll most likely re-read it, see if it triggers any uses and then move on.
I am going to scream. And scream. And scream. When will I learn never, never to type my message in the message box because I know the gremlins will eat it before its done.
I need to write on the board 100 times, type in Word first, then post to message board.
I hate saying things twice so I won’t.
I was talking about losing time. The last week to flu. I’m still coughing and emitting a disgusting amount of mucus but feeling much better. I’ve never slept so much in my life as I have the last 5 days. Up an hour, down for 3. Exhausting stuff.
I’m reading lesson 16 on How to Think Sideways. I’ve only gotten through module one. It’s a checklist of your ms. And how to identify problems and fix them but most of all how to keep moving forward. The big message that I’m getting, the one hitting closest to home is: You can’t fix it if it isn’t finished. She repeated that 3 times in a row.
It’s probably the #1 reason I fail. (I started to type I cannot but I’m changing that) I do not get my work done. Even when I get up to the final chapter, I resist putting the finishing scenes in. If I could figure out that one glitch, I’d be prolific because right now, I have 4 novels, 4 workable novels, 1 mystery, 2 intermediate, and one paranormal/fantasy that are all possible stories as far as characters and plot. I have got to stop playing at this and buckle down to serious production.
Add to that I have a ton of ideas for non-fiction markets. I could do this if I’d ever get my head on straight. It’s incredibly frustrating because I don’t believe my failure is lack of knowledge or lack of talent. It’s the work ethic. I am not approaching this as a business with business hours and structured work time. My house is still running in chaos and I have to figure out a way to stop that.
Part of the chaos is of my own making. I allow people to spin me in different directions, much like a pin ball machine with me being the ball. I need to figure out a way to inactivate the flippers. Or at least figure out how to decrease their frequency.
Part of it is not respecting my time. And I’m not talking here about others. I’m talking about me. If I don’t set up the rules. Don’t insist on valuing my own time, give my work the respect and time it needs, then why should anybody else?
If I step up, stand firm and insist on the value of my time and what I choose to do with it, others would follow suit. I’m not sure yet what that means in terms of blocking out time. I am responsible for so many things beyond my control. I could list a dozen reasons why I’m failing but they would just be excuses.
I really need to focus, define my goals, figure out a reasonable division of time, preferably a fair division of time but fair doesn’t always enter into it. The best I can do is analyze, decide what needs to stay and then figure out how to use the gaps. If I’m ruthless, I can enlarge the time gaps enough to be productive. Actually, even 5 minute increments move me forward. Back to my baby steps theory. I like baby steps. They put me in control because any movement is progress.
I have to stop flipping from project to project and concentrate on one at a time. I have a folder for each project. Ideas can easily be added. I don’t need to waste hours. But in among the ideas I need to be working on one solid project. I’ve never yet figured out why being held in one place, on one project, makes me feel trapped. It shouldn’t, yet it does. The minute the doors clang shut, I’m clamoring for freedom when the real freedom comes at completion of the project. Sometimes, I think it’s because so much of my life is beyond my own control. So the little bit of freedom that remains keeps me from becoming anxious. The bird’s wings fluttering against the bars come to mind when I said that. And that’s what it feels like. The caged bird, caged from choice but still caged. I don’t like having any more doors closed.
This is a total ramble. Only done to clarify my own thoughts and emotions. Not sure if anybody else can relate to it or not but one of the reasons I’m enjoying HtTS so much is the self-analysis and self-knowledge that I’m gaining. Holly makes me think.
I am going to scream. And scream. And scream. When will I learn never, never to type my message in the message box because I know the gremlins will eat it before its done.
I need to write on the board 100 times, type in Word first, then post to message board.
I hate saying things twice so I won’t.
I was talking about losing time. The last week to flu. I’m still coughing and emitting a disgusting amount of mucus but feeling much better. I’ve never slept so much in my life as I have the last 5 days. Up an hour, down for 3. Exhausting stuff.
I’m reading lesson 16 on How to Think Sideways. I’ve only gotten through module one. It’s a checklist of your ms. And how to identify problems and fix them but most of all how to keep moving forward. The big message that I’m getting, the one hitting closest to home is: You can’t fix it if it isn’t finished. She repeated that 3 times in a row.
It’s probably the #1 reason I fail. (I started to type I cannot but I’m changing that) I do not get my work done. Even when I get up to the final chapter, I resist putting the finishing scenes in. If I could figure out that one glitch, I’d be prolific because right now, I have 4 novels, 4 workable novels, 1 mystery, 2 intermediate, and one paranormal/fantasy that are all possible stories as far as characters and plot. I have got to stop playing at this and buckle down to serious production.
Add to that I have a ton of ideas for non-fiction markets. I could do this if I’d ever get my head on straight. It’s incredibly frustrating because I don’t believe my failure is lack of knowledge or lack of talent. It’s the work ethic. I am not approaching this as a business with business hours and structured work time. My house is still running in chaos and I have to figure out a way to stop that.
Part of the chaos is of my own making. I allow people to spin me in different directions, much like a pin ball machine with me being the ball. I need to figure out a way to inactivate the flippers. Or at least figure out how to decrease their frequency.
Part of it is not respecting my time. And I’m not talking here about others. I’m talking about me. If I don’t set up the rules. Don’t insist on valuing my own time, give my work the respect and time it needs, then why should anybody else?
If I step up, stand firm and insist on the value of my time and what I choose to do with it, others would follow suit. I’m not sure yet what that means in terms of blocking out time. I am responsible for so many things beyond my control. I could list a dozen reasons why I’m failing but they would just be excuses.
I really need to focus, define my goals, figure out a reasonable division of time, preferably a fair division of time but fair doesn’t always enter into it. The best I can do is analyze, decide what needs to stay and then figure out how to use the gaps. If I’m ruthless, I can enlarge the time gaps enough to be productive. Actually, even 5 minute increments move me forward. Back to my baby steps theory. I like baby steps. They put me in control because any movement is progress.
I have to stop flipping from project to project and concentrate on one at a time. I have a folder for each project. Ideas can easily be added. I don’t need to waste hours. But in among the ideas I need to be working on one solid project. I’ve never yet figured out why being held in one place, on one project, makes me feel trapped. It shouldn’t, yet it does. The minute the doors clang shut, I’m clamoring for freedom when the real freedom comes at completion of the project. Sometimes, I think it’s because so much of my life is beyond my own control. So the little bit of freedom that remains keeps me from becoming anxious. The bird’s wings fluttering against the bars come to mind when I said that. And that’s what it feels like. The caged bird, caged from choice but still caged. I don’t like having any more doors closed.
This is a total ramble. Only done to clarify my own thoughts and emotions. Not sure if anybody else can relate to it or not but one of the reasons I’m enjoying HtTS so much is the self-analysis and self-knowledge that I’m gaining. Holly makes me think.
